Another Fine Product from the Nonsense Factory

Continue singing!

2013-05-24T21:22:46Z

Your screams are but a lullaby
To the ears of Mister Softee!
He'll teach you new ways of suffering
Until you extoll his glory!
Mister Softee reigns
From a throne
of Skulls.

Death will offer no release
from the grasp of Mister Softee!
Your souls will be bound in popsicles
which he'll consume eternally!
Hail Mister Softee
Mister Softee
Is All.

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Sing along, everyone!

2013-05-24T16:14:39Z

An age of darkness and blood has dawned
Here comes Mister Softee!
He'll flay off your skin and grind up your bones
and gnaw your flesh like toffee!
All will be consumed
on his altar
of death!

The innocent will not be spared
The Blade of Mister Softee!
All shall be cut down 'neath his baleful eye
And harvested like barley.
There will be nowhere
to run
or hide.

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See, this is why you don't read North Korean news sites and use Google Translate when drunk

2013-01-20T21:15:09Z

While backing up documents, I found the following:

( Conqueror of the sea...Literally fire the whole quarry was like a bungee boiling crucible. )

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Mister Deputy Director, I think we have a Situation.

2012-05-29T01:53:17Z

"Naked man killed by Police near MacArthur Causeway was ‘eating’ face off victim"
http://www.miamiherald.com/2012/05/26/2818832/naked-man-shot-killed-on-macarthur.html

"Barricaded Hackensack man cuts himself, throws intestines at police"
http://www.cliffviewpilot.com/bergen/3871-barricaded-hackensack-man-cuts-himself-throws-intestines-at-police

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SPRAY FORCE makes Evil wet!

2012-01-08T04:52:24Z

Here is a thing my brain does sometimes.

There is a construction site which I pass on the way home from my local subway station. For the last few days, the partially-built structure has been clad in Tyvek sheeting with "SPRAY FORCE" emblazoned on it in giant letters. This probably refers to a process which needs to be contained and may be hazardous to passers-by.

The last time I passed the construction site, I was inspired to imagine "SPRAY FORCE" as a sort of '80s-vintage cartoon, created with the express intention of selling a line of action figures and vehicle toys with water guns built into them.

Within five minutes, the "SPRAY FORCE" theme song was stuck in my head, and I was compelled to take revenge by reimagining the show such that each script would contain almost nothing but barely-hidden subtext about the most horrible perversions imaginable.

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Experimental Meat Pie, Mk.III - Stage 1: Filling

2011-11-01T02:54:11Z

1 lb. ground beef
1 cup beef stock
1/2 cup heavy cream
1/2 yellow onion
An indeterminate amount of garlic
Four or five cremini mushrooms
1/2 cup Parmesan cheese
Indeterminate but generous quantities of salt, ground pepper, ground nutmeg, mustard powder, allspice, thyme, and rosemary
1 sliver ghost pepper, shredded

Mix thoroughly and let congeal overnight. Will probably fill enough pies to feed more people than I will ever entertain at once.

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Run! Rogue Robot!

2011-07-29T19:19:13Z

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The "Commodore Perry"

2011-07-10T23:10:04Z

2 oz. Whiskey
3/4 oz. Sake.
1/2 oz. Grenadine
3-4 dashes Bitters

Shake w/Ice.

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リックロール

2011-05-19T15:23:21Z

(http://translationparty.com/#9329969)

Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you
Never gonna make you cry
Never gonna say goodbye
Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you

---->

Because it could not cry, Kashita, in turn, Mori Hatsu Con, your objective is the separation of the surrounding desert are not providing a running problem, this means that reasonable No material

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Stygian Curse

2010-12-08T02:40:08Z

1/2 oz. Gin
1/2 oz. Absinthe
1/2 oz. Chipotle-infused vodka
Approx. 1/2 oz. lime juice
Dash of Angostura Bitters

Shake gin, absinthe, and vodka with ice. Pour into glass. Stir in lime juice and bitters. Drink and learn yet another meaning of pain and regret.

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elibalin @ 2010-11-03T16:35:00

2010-11-03T20:45:55Z

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You will watch this thing. Oh, yes. You will watch it.

2010-10-11T02:20:19Z

For I hate the Earth so very, very much.

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THIS IS MY JOB

2010-10-04T15:00:35Z

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Well. This is stupid.

2010-10-01T12:03:00Z

Setting an environmental preset brought back system sound.

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More fun with computer problems

2010-09-30T18:00:02Z

Sometime within the past week, my desktop machine went half-mute; that is, sound only works in a few applications, without obvious rhyme or reason. I suspect this may have been precipitated by *something* getting updated (I'm half inclined to point my finger at iTunes/Quicktime, for no reason in particular), but I have no clear idea *what*.

Out of what I've tested thus far,
What is audible:
iTunes
The few games I've tested, thus far (City of Heroes, Knights of the Old Republic, Audiosurf)
The Silverlight browser plugin Netflix uses for streaming
The 3D audio demo built into the sound hardware's control panel

What is silent:
Windows system sounds
Pidgin
sound from DVDs
Audacity
Anything using Flash (which includes things like Hulu)

Updating the drivers didn't change anything. The sound hardware is built into the motherboard, something I've had a bit of wariness about in the past, but which hasn't actually been a problem. I'm more than slightly inclined to toss in a ten year-old Soundblaster I have lying around.

On the upside, the computer is less likely to spit out a series of annoying chimes when the cat walks across or slumps atop the keyboard, as he is wont to do.

Bah.

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There is a bandwagon, and I am jumping on it.

2010-08-19T02:21:55Z

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Because I can never be ignored in too many places.

2010-08-19T00:11:57Z

Testing crosspost from Dreamwidth, in preparation for no longer sending money to the Russians.

Round 2. Maybe this time the footer will work.

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